• theloathiest

Personals: Fluffernutter Wanted


Insert your own sex act description.

It's a fluffernutter, simple, uncomplicated, loved by 7 year olds and 70 year olds and pretty much no one in between. Look that thing, though. It's gushing grilled peanut butter and marshmallow fluff.


I'm immediately intrigued at why this isn't an official sex act yet. I've spent the last ten minutes going over what the schematics would be. I must tell you, I'm both amazed and ashamed at myself. This is obviously not the forum for even the most basics of a description. Let me just tell you, I wouldn't do it without a signed waiver.


I need Craiglist personals to come back so I can post.


"White male looking for like minded individuals for adult fluffernutter fun. Waiver required. Serious inquiries only. FN/DBSM/SF/RMQ/LJFRM/PDQ."


I don't know what any of the usual acronyms are, and I'm afraid to google. Just go with it.


So, to make it, it's pretty simple. Take two slices of bread, lightly butter the outside. Spread one side with your favorite peanut butter (or nutella - because). Spread the other with marshmallow fluff. Heat some butter in a skillet over medium heat. Gently place sandwich in skillet. When one side is perfectly done to your liking and wonderful, flip. Do the other side. There is joy in watching it ooze. Share half with a friend.


Heck, I think that's my sex act right there. "When one side is perfectly done to your liking and wonderful, flip. Do the other side. There is joy in watching it ooze. Share half with a friend."


I have problems.









0 views

©2019 by The Loathiest. Proudly created with Wix.com